Gotta Take the Good With the Bad

So on Tuesday, i didn't go into school in the morning even though i said i would....

Oops.

But i did go in.....in the afternoon.

I woke and still felt like crap, slightly better but crap overall. Then i had a realisation. All my tests were in the afternoon, so i suggested to my mum if i could just go in for the afternoon so i didn't miss the tests. She didn't like it for some reason but my dad did and so it eventually ended up that way.

I went in and did the 1st part of the maths paper. I thought i would be sitting the one i missed on Monday but i just slotted into doing the same (calculator) test with the rest of the class, which was an annoyance coz i was more prepared for the non-calculator.
But i needn't have worried. The paper was pretty easy, and for me, thats saying something. I answered all the questions and i felt quite good about it, was only the first half but at least i did my best.

Music theory test came after this and it was bareable. Difficult enough but not to the point of impossible.

I don't need to say anything about biology apart from it was crap.


And so, today.

2 tests.

Maths part 2 was the 2nd half of the calculator paper and it was a lot harder than the 1st half. Loads of angles and volumes and triangles and circles.

Ugh.

Think i did ok but i wont get my hopes up yet.

And the media exam which counted for 20% of my final exam result was after lunch. I found out we had to leave english 15 minutes early, that was good, we got an hour to do the paper.
45 minutes just isn't enough and the extra 15 were really helpful.
Still had to write quick but i got to fill in some of the gaps after i finished. Didn't really stop writing at all so i have quite a good feeling about it although analysing the front page of The Sun isn't really anything exciting.


I was so relived when i plonked myself down on the bus after that test. Still got a sore head and i feel quite tired but the only thing i have to worry about now is the other maths paper tomorrow.

So, when got home i thought, due to the majority of my tests out of the way i would play my bass for a bit, some Muse, always cheers me up....



EXCEPT WHEN THE FUCKING NEIGHBOURS COMPLAIN ABOUT THE NOISE!!!

Which btw, they've done before.

I hate our neighbous on both sides. We live in a terraced house. 4 houses joined to each other. Pretty small, we're one of the middle houses which sucks coz we're surrounded on all sides.
If we had one of the houses on the end then i could make more noise but as only one wall divides our houses, it alters my bass playing.

That pisses me off greatly.

I'm in the middle of having pretty much the only fun i'll get today then my mum tells me i have to stop.

All coz of our moany neighbours, who, i shall say, i have never got on with and i never will. And the thing is, i've played it louder than i was playing it just there and they haven't said anything....

But getting interrupted like that really puts you on a downer. I'm actually quite angry right now.
I'm quite surprised they can hear anything being that fuckin old but there ya are....


To be honest, the title of this post doesn't really make much sense. Should be more like "Gotta Take the Bad With the Bad" coz this week has been nothing short of awful really.
I've missed tests, missed important school work, been feeling ill and now i can't even....reward myself.

And now i'm probably making everybody else feel bad coz they've got to read about me feeling bad.
Sorry, wasn't quite what i had intended. This post was going to look a lot different up until half an hour ago.

Thank my neighbours.


Cheers,
Rowan


Times like this calls for some loud, angry Rage.
I know i've posted this song before but turn that shit up!

Meh....

Ah, so today wasn't so bad. I just laid in bed all day, slept a few hours then finished my Muse book and started to read my Stephen Fry book too.

Missing school today wasn't as bad as i first thought it might be.

Still its bad missing school this close to exams but i called round a few people and asked how the tests were that i missed. Turns out that only the maths test took place, with biology being tomorrow and media on Wednesday.

Tomorrow will still be full of it tho.
The afternoon in particular, 3 periods of back-to-back tests after lunch. Maths then music then biology.

Fun, fun, fun.

And it's not really a question of whether i go into school tomorrow it is i will be going into school.
I told my mum i need to go in by hook or by crook so even if im spewing my guts up she's under orders to send me in.

I got off with it today just about, but missing tomorrow would be a disaster.
Maths is now going to carry on till Thursday so i wont get my mark back until easter school which is a pain in the ass.


But anyway, this illness. It's nothing major, just a small bug or a really annoying cold.
So where did it come from?

I'll tell you....

Alex.

Yeh, all last week he was complaining of being unwell and wasn't in school on Friday so i dont see where else i got it from. (And no JJ, it wasn't your hugs and kisses, but even if it was, it doesn't bother me :P)


So maybe tonight i will get some decent sleep and perhaps feel better in the morning. I don't feel much better right now but at least i've got some food down me and i've had a nice, warm bath.

Just need to cross my fingers and hope for the best....

Cheers,
Rowan


P.S Today i was looking to find some blank discs and i came across a disc with a load of my Grandad's old documents on it. (He passed away 4 years ago)
I wasn't snooping but i seen one entitled "Hugging", it interested me, i read it and i thought it was really nice so i'm going to put it on here now :


"Hugging is good medicine.
It transfers energy and gives the person hugged an emotional uplift.
You need four hugs a day for survival, eight for maintenance, and twelve for growth.
Scientists say that hugging is a form of communication because it can say things that humans don’t have words for.
And the nicest thing about a hug is that you usually can’t give one without getting one back."


Really nice, no?

So hugs to everyone reading this, love you all!

Damn It

Bad news. I didnt get much sleep last night and neither am i feeling any better this morning :(

I woke up and i could immediately sense that nothing had changed after my few hours of sleep.
My head is still sore, as well as my throat, my eyes are sore and heavy....

No way would i be able to sit any tests today.
I would absolutely fuck them up if i was to sit them. I am just not in the right frame of mind at all to be doing any tests.

So i went straight to mum and told her exactly that (minus the fuck) and she said i could stay off but questioned if i was unprepared for the tests to which i said i was ready for them.

I wanted to go in today. I wanted to get these tests done. Missing them is just going to cause all sorts of complications....

*sigh*

Dunno what else to say, just thought i would let you guys know


Rowan

Next (Short) Week

This week is going to be one day shorter as the Easter holidays start on Friday so only four days of school this week!
Which you may think is a good thing but seeing as there are only four days, the teachers have pretty much decided to cram everything they possibly can into this week.

Let's see, i have at least half a dozen tests in the space of these four days.

Tomorrow : 1st part of maths, then biology test, then 20% of my final media studies exam.
And those tests are right after one another by the way, no restbite tomorrow morning.

Tuesday has the 2nd part of the maths test and a music theory test. Both, incidentally, after each other as well.
Im good at music practical but so crap with theory....

Then Wednesday has the 3rd part of the maths test.


Really, the maths is the backbone of the week, covering three days.
It has also been called a "2nd prelim" and can be used in an appeal for the final exam.

Now, as you know, maths is not my strong point and naturally, i am still really worried about this test.
Also doubled with the fact that i feel quite unwell right now and have had 5 hours sleep in the past 48 hours doesnt help me at all.

I will be ok tho. Just a sore throat and head and some good night's sleep should see me ok tomorrow, or so i hope.
However, today is Sunday.....SSS much?
Never usually get much sleep on Sundays but i'm ready to nod off right now.


Anyway i find it quite strange how last week, quiet and boring, will be so different to this week.

*sigh*

School.....

I can't wait for these holidays.....actually it makes no difference, i still have easter school to attend during the holidays on a few different occasions, so thanks to school i can't really even have holidays....

*another sigh*

I knew these few months would be tough but it's only when you get there do you realise how tough it really is.
And i'm not even in the "eye of the storm" yet.
That comes during mid-May.

The music theory final exam is on 28th April but the exams come thick and fast starting May 13th with English.

I'll talk about my timetable closer to the time.....


Bur for now, im off to the land of nod.....hopefully.


Cheers,
Rowan


Fumy oak juice

Boring Week

Yeh, hence the lack of posts this week :P

Pretty uneventful to say the least so i've tried to let things build up to make a bigger post so here we are.

I did go to the maths supported study on Tuesday and i thought it was pretty useful. Just sat down and did a past paper (old exam paper) and whatever question i got stuck on there was always a teacher on hand to help.
Gonna keep going as much as i can, kinda regret that that was my first one tho and there can't be many left....

Complete contrast the next day tho in Biology.
The teacher was useless, she hardly taught us anything just kinda rushed through stuff, too fast for me to get a grasp of. Alex was there too and he thought the same.
I thought we would be getting the same teacher as the week before, who actually explained stuff, but we didn't.
I'll keep going tho, i need to.
Got in test in biology on Monday too, as well as a few other tests.

It will be crap on Monday. 3 tests.
Maths is the first. It's the "2nd" Prelim.
And it will last three periods of that week.
After that is biology.
Then after biology i will have a media studies exam. Yes, exam. Analysing the front page of a news paper which will count toward 20% of my final grade so i won't even get the mark back until August.
But i will get maths and biology back.....dunno if i want them tho :P


So yeh, i seem to be talking about next week instead of this week, simply coz there isn't a lot worth mentioning.
Well stuff i dont know is worth mentioning but i suppose i will anyway :

I was sitting on my computer last night and my mum came in and said my hair has been looking nice recently :P
(Random, but nice)

Then she said she is going to the hairdressers soon and i should go just to get the ends trimmed and then one day she said she would straighten my hair coz it would look better and be way longer lol.
I just said ok and shrugged.

Then this morning i went and took my shower as usual and my mum did another strange thing.
She told me she got me a packet of razors and some shaving cream :P
It's never something we've talked about much before. I normally just took one out of my dad's packet, used it for me and he never used it.
He must have noticed one was missing and decided to buy me my own.
That was cool.
Just in case you're confused....i never used the same razor as my dad. I took one and kept it in my little "case" in the bathroom. I know not to share a razor coz you can get infections but now there really isn't a chance of that happening.

Also, another...."grown up" thing happened today.
I got my National Insurance card in the post. Now i can legally work :P
They usually don't give them out until you are 16 but i think they're starting to give them out a little earlier now, still 2 and a bit months till my birthday in June.
So yeh, i'm becoming a man now lol

Probably a good amount of time until that fully happens tho. I can have some fun for another few years at least!
(I heard it goes downhill when you become an adult :P)

Oh and while on the subject of birthdays....it happens to be a very special day for a very special someone.
That someone is JJ. XD
Happy birthday JJ!!!

Go say happy birthday if you haven't already :P (link is in the blog roll)


Cheers,
Rowan





Apparently they're singing happy birthday to a BBC show called "Saturday Club" for an anniversary i would assume but let's just pretend it says "to JJ" instead of "to Saturday Club" :P

Mondayzzzz

I was quite tired today, as i normally am on a Monday due to what i call Sunday Sleep Syndrome or SSS
I stay up till like 2/3am on Friday and Saturday night so i'm never tired when Sunday night rolls around and i tend to sit on my ipod until really late. Must have been about 2am last night so i only got about 5 hours of sleep.
It's not healthy for me i know, and sitting browsing the internet for hours on end reading random things really gets me in a deep thinking mood like it did last night.

I won't go into detail about what i was thinking last night, simply coz i'd rather not but the topics vary and cover a wide range and really leave my head in a mess on Monday.

So i hope you understand that Monday is hardly ever a good day.

Not that today was bad, just wasn't anything special.

Music is getting boring, as the exams are finished there is no need to play instruments any longer so all we will do from now until the exam is listening. *yawn*

Maths and Biology are gradually becoming my main priorities now, what with my low scores, i have to attend extra classes and stuff like that. It sucks but i do not want to be doing either next year so i am determined to pass them.
I think there is an extra maths class on tomorrow after school and there definetely is one for biology on Wednesday.
So i will be in attendance.

A cool thing happened today at lunch.
It was rather boring until Alex suggested we play thumb wars and arm wrestling lol.
This is where i want to introduce a new, very good friend of mine called Louis (French spelling but just pronounced like Lewis)
He is small and skinny with medium length, jet black hair.
To be honest my three best friends probably are Steven, Alex and Louis.

But back to the story - arm wrestling.
Steven, as i have mentioned, is all talk and wouldn't hurt a fly, he doesn't have the strength to haha, and this was proved when Louis beat him in an arm wrestling battle :P
Everyone really took the mickey out on Steven as i don't remember him winning a match but there ya go.

I wanted to challenge my cute friend Alan to a match today but he wasn't around, maybe tomorrow :D

Erm, PE was surprisingly good. We had exactly 22 people playing football so we got to make full teams and have a full game which is always fun, was sunny too, just a shame i was too tired to fully get into it....

That's all that really happened today, hope i get some better sleep tonight, i think i will, it's only usually Sundays that are a problem.

Cheers,
Rowan


P.S There is a new blog i want to let you guys know about. Drucloud has a blog. He comments regularly on here so it's the least i can do is link and  follow and i hope more people do so too.
Here is the link : http://thisishowitfeels-drucloud.blogspot.com/

Saturday Morning Maths

6:30am is no time for a 15 year old boy to be awake on a Saturday morning, let me just say that.

But i was this morning, due to this maths class at school.

I just lay in bed after my alarm went off thinking "What did i do to deserve this?" The answer : I failed my prelim.

But to wake myself up i listened to Rage Against the Machine really loudly, then had a shower then a bottle of Lucozade just before i went out the door and i was actually feeling ok.

That's what i was not looking forward to - being tired. Class is just an absolute no when you're feeling tired so, feeling alive enough made it better than i had anticipated.

I was expecting there to be nobody i knew there but there was a good few people, Freddie was there too but i didn't really get the chance to talk to him as he was at the other side of the room for the 3 hour duration but i at least got to sit next to someone i was friendly with and could work together with too.

That's what probably made the class better, not feeling tired and sitting with someone i get on with.

And the teacher made things better too, i prefer his teaching methods to that of my normal teacher and the way he does stuff just got through to me better.

It wasn't a complete waste of time, far from it.
So i'll be looking forward to it a bit more next time (as much as somebody can look forward to maths on a Saturday morning)


Just going to the class tho isn't enough, i need to do other studying and i will.
The fact that i will have to re-do maths next year if i fail the exam has made me determined to pass it.


Cheers guys,
Rowan

Guitar Exam

Hey guys, just a quick post to let you know that the guitar exam today went well.

It wasn't as plain sailing as the bass exam but i can't complain, i never expected it to be.

Just like the bass setup, i played one song all the way through, which went without any glitches.
Then play my two other pieces about halfway through.
First one was fine, on the 2nd one i made a few errors although it's pretty much the only errors i made in both of the exams so i don't think there's anything to worry about.

I wish i could say that i had results for you but.....they won't come back until August, when i get all my exam results in the one go.
These two practical exams count towards our final mark which is why we don't get them back yet.

Apart from that, today was the usual Thursday, tough and tiring and i even forgot to bring my guitar home after school *facepalm*
But it's safe is the music store so i can get it tomorrow :P


Cheers,
Rowan


Here is a song i'm currently learning on guitar, it is one of my favourite songs by Wolfmother and is called Tales, or by it's full name, Tales From the Forest of Gnomes.



From what i can gather it's about forgetting all of your regrets, just putting all the bad stuff behind you and looking ahead to the future.....
It's a real feel good song anyway, and never fails to cheer me up :)


And here's a pic of my guitar.

Middle o' the Week

School-wise, not too much happened today.

A few things i wanted to say tho,

PE is getting to be rather annoying coz we're playing outside at the moment, it's freezing and windy and the wind messes up my hair for the rest of the day :P

I think i need it cut soon anyway but yeh....

RE is also falling from grace.
Not much discussion happens anymore, we just do work like a normal class....
Also in RE, as Steven sits behind me, i've noticed he is calling me "gay" or "fag" a bit more often these days.
I dunno if he's being serious tho or just being like every other thicko who uses these expressions.
He says things like, "Rowan, ya fag" and stuff like tht when he wants my attention, to which i ignore of course until he just calls my name.
When he did it a few times today i felt like turning around and asking, "Is there something you really want to ask or say to me?" Perhaps provoking him to ask if i'm gay or not.

Dunno why i would wanr to ask that tho coz i dont really know what i would say if he asked me.
I certainly think he is becoming a bit more suspicious of me tho....

I went to biology supported study after school today but i really needn't have.
They pretty much covered what i knew (problem solving questions, graphs etc.) but next week they will cover knowledge and understanding questions which is where i fall down so i will be in attendance next week too.

Lastly, just another heads up that tomorrow is my guitar exam.
It got changed to 11am for some reason today but yeh, i have been over my pieces a few times tonight and i played them fairly well, i would be happy if i can replicate that performance tomorrow.



So, away from school stuff.

I was delighted to return home today to find that my mum got me another Stephen Fry book!
One i was actually wanting her to get, "Moab is my Washpot"
It's an autobiography and i've just been wanting to read it for a while so that should be cool.
My mum only found it in a charity shop but i don't mind.
I wonder if she had a look as to what the book is about....it does mention on the blurb and the inside page about homosexuality......


Also, i was reading some comments on JJ's latest post and i found a comment by an anonymous person who linked a NY Times magazine article in his comment. (http://www.nytimes.com/2009/09/27/magazine/27out-t.html)

Curiosity took over and i went to read it.

I found it to be particularly interesting, it is about gay youth/coming out in middle schools....

One thing that really caught me though was the mention of a Day of Silence to raise awareness of homophobic bullying.
I researched it online and found out that this year it will be on Friday April 16th.

I'm gonna try to do it.

Then i thought it would be difficult coz i would be in school but i realised that we are still on holidays on the 16th.
This kinda makes me think it is a little pointless, coz the main aim is to be silent during the school day whereas i will most likely be in the house then.....

I still think i will try it tho, even if i am only in the house although i would have liked the challenge of it at school and baffling everyone as to why i was a mute for the day.

The real way it works is through a group called Glsen (Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network)
I think this only exist in America, but im not 100% sure on that.

But now, i put it to you, the reader here, can you try and stay silent on that day this year?
Regardless of whether there is or isn't a Glsen group around.
Regardless of where you happen to be that day, at work, in school, in the house....

I'm gonna give it a go, who's joining me?


Cheers guys,
Rowan

Split Into Two...

This week is split into two halves for me. One busy and one quiet.

This is the quiet side.

Tomorrow afternoon starts the busy side.

Yesterday and today haven't seen much happening apart from one thing really....I managed to speak to Freddie.

I caught him at the end of maths as we were packing our stuff back into our bags.

Don't get carried away tho, i hardly know him so there was no big conversation but the best way to start things was to just smile and say "Hi" which i did.
He said "Hi" back and then i asked him how he was doing and he simply said "it's ok"

Then the bell rang and off he went.

It's obvious that he really doesn't want to speak about anything but maybe just by saying hi and being friendly i might earn his trust a little and maybe there may be more to speak of in the future.
At least there's no fresh bullying news against him at the moment.....

Elsewhere, this week, one blogger who i hold in quite high regard has returned, if you like.
James on "The Everday Life and Thoughts of a Fabulous Teen" had seemingly disappeared for about 4 months, so i was really pleased to see two new posts by him, it seems like he has been playing his xbox a lot recently....

The reason i hold him in high regard is for the fact that his blog is the first one i ever read, it gripped me and made me want to do something like it, henceforth, i started my blog.
So, if you get the time, have a little nosey, i'm sure he won't mind :P
http://foreverfabulousjames.blogspot.com/


As i said, that's all that has been happening this side of the week, tomorrow is where it kicks off.

In biology today, my teacher recommended i attend supported study tomorrow after school, which basically means, you will be attending supported study tomorrow.

What fun.

So i have that tomorrow. then my guitar exam on Thursday, like the prelim, i dont not feel as confident as i do on the bass but oh well.

On Friday i have two tests, one in media and one in french.....great.

And Saturday sees my first weekend maths class.

Getting up at 7am on a Saturday just wont be right and i wont even be able to stay up late on friday due to that.
I also found it annoying today that our head of year got angry about the attendance of maths supported study.
He asked me why i didn't go and i told him that if i am going to a 3 hour class on saturday morning then i shouldnt have to go to supported study.

Of course, he disagreed but i'm sorry, no matter what he says i'm not going after school, especially as i'm giving up my saturday for him (he will be one of the teachers there on Saturday.)


Unfortunately, there isn't much to look forward to this week, just gonna have to grin and BEAR.....(?) it.


Love you guys,
Rowan


P.S I was sorta half-singing a Muse song today at the end of english and the guy that sits next to me (who is also a muse fan) was surprised at how high i can sing.
I asked him if he could go tht high and he said no and i told him that i can get higher, which i honestly can.

But the song i was singing is called Falling Down, it's a nice relaxing song and it's pretty awesome in my opinion.
Pay attention to the high notes, i honestly can reach them. Ok, it doesn't sound as good but i can hit them :P
There is a song which has higher parts and i can reach them too but i'll post them another time, anything more than this at the moment might freak you out :P

Brand's Birthday and Mother's Day

I was only told yesterday that today was in fact Brand's birthday.

I knew that a whole group of us were going to play football today, which we did do, but the best i could do for Brand was get him a card and slip some money in it :-/

Would have liked to give him something a bit better but i think he was happy with the card and money.....

Football was really what we all went for though.
We managed to get the big pitch coz Brand pre-booked it a few days ago, so that was really good with loads of space.

After about 2 hours of football we all stopped and had piggyback wars and races :P

We all laughed that we paid so much money for the pitch and now we were using it for piggyback wars lol.

But yeh, 5 teams for the piggyback wars, it was mayhem. Just people falling all about the place.....on top of each other too, on occasion :P

Overall, a good day and as we were leaving Brand's parents said to him that now he is 16 they might let him have a few beers and what not.....
Let's just hope those beers don't become margaritas, eh?


Mothers Day - and Fathers Day for tht matter of fact. I don't get the point, where is Kids day?
KO
"Everyday is kids day" according to my parents.

I got my mum some nice Thornton's chocolates (last box in the shop!) along with a card.
Whenever i write a card i like to add my own messages inside as well.

For this one i was thinking "Love you mum......P.S i'm gay"

:P

I didn't do that lol, she too, seemed to be happy with what she got but two cards and gifts to two different people on the same day....i'm broke!

And i still owe my mum about 15 pounds for paying off Steven's iPod.....

Phhhhhhh.

I don't like owing people money, it sucks.

Ah well, it'll work out.

Anyhoo, i'll stop my rambling to leave you with another Queen song that i absolutely adore. Another one of my favs, it's a groovy little number.

Cheers guys,
Rowan




I wanted to embed the official video but youtube doesn't allow you to :(
It's great, Freddie Mercury dancing around, sorta like if Elvis was gay lol

Here's the link to the official video - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zO6D_BAuYCI

Enjoy!

Today's Day

So, i woke up really tired this morning which really confused me coz i went to bed at a decent enough time last night.
I struggled to get out of bed to be honest but getting into school actually woke me up a little, strangely.

A few interesting things happened today.

Firstly,

PE.

We played football outside and it was absolutely freezing but still quite enjoyable.
But that's not what i really want to talk about.
It was something with Steven. (Yeh, seems every time i mention him it's coz of a comment he made :P)

Role-reversal this time.

I thought i would see how Steven reacted if i called him gay.
So i did, it seemed alien saying it tho coz i never do say it but i called him "a big gay" just out of interest and he simply laughed at me.
Probably coz he's never heard me say it.

But yeh, it felt quite strange saying it, i just got this thing in my mind wondering what Steven would say but i didn't really get an answer so i left it that.

I didn't enjoy saying it and i didn't really want to but i felt as if i had to just to see what would happen.
Needless to say, i won't be saying anything like it again any time soon, that just isn't me....


In maths, i sealed my fate by handing in the consent form to attend the extra lessons....
No backing out now, just gotta grin and bare it.

You might also be wondering what happened with Freddie and the truth is....nothing.

I can't get to speak to him, he's a slippery character and just makes his way straight out of the door when the bell rings.
I think it's deliberate for the reason that he doesn't want to speak to anyone and trust me, i have tried to speak to him but to no avail....


Biology was the main event today tho, as it can quite often be :P

I'll put it short - i got to hold hands with a boy :)


Ok, it's not quite as exciting or deliberate as it may seem but it was still pretty cool.

The boy i held hands with is a good friend of mine called Brandon, but i call him Brand.
Now, in my group of 2 dozen or so friendly people, i do of course have suspicions over a few that they may be gay and Brand is one of them.
Out of all my friends, he is one who sets off my gaydar and i wouldnt be surprised at all if he was gay
He's not had a girlfriend and he never talks about girls so i think i have reason to think he may be gay.

But any, what happened....

It was at the end of class after the bell rang and we were all packing our stuff into our bags to go home.

Brand and this other boy were having a sort of hand crushing "competition" and the teacher said in a light-hearted way "Stop holding hands boys"
They did.

And i said, "Oh come on sir, surely there's nothing wrong with that" and i took Brand's hand and we walked out the class saying "Bye sir" at the same time to which the teacher laughed.
Biology teacher is a legend.

It didn't end there tho, Brand held my hand for a little longer than i anticipated. Longer than most would....

As i said, i do have reason to believe he might be gay.....


It was a good end to a rather long day.
Thursday always is, just coz it's a 7 period day and the way the subjects are ordered just makes things rather strenuous.
But that was nice.

I don't have a crush on Brand or anything tho, neither do i stare at him in class but he's still pretty nice.
Funny too.


Well that's all really on another draining Thursday and there isn't much else to blab about so i'll stop here :)


Cheers,
Rowan




Yes, i enjoy adding songs at the end of a post that i like and have a relevant title :P

I H4T3 M4TH5

Gah!

Today was ok, but of course, as you may (or may not) have identified, maths wasn't.

Today's period of maths was the normal, do the starter, start a page in the textbook etc.

But halfway through, the head of maths comes in and asks to speak to the following people, me being one of them.

I had an idea what is was about so i reluctantly got out of my seat with the rest of the damned and went with him.

He told us what i was expecting. Remedial classes.

*sigh*

And to make things worse....on a Saturday morning from 9am until......noon.

My heart sank as he gave us the letter and told the six of us tht he was expecting us to be there for those two extra classes plus the Easter School that they will be running.

I didn't want to go home and give the letter to my mum, but i did.
She would have found out eventually, so why prolong it?

She just basically said that she expects me to go as well.

What bullcrap.

Gotta give up my morning of doing nothing to sit in a classroom doing maths for 3 hours....twice.

The only saving grace is that we don't have to wear uniform but that's no consolation in my book.

First class is next Saturday and the other is about a month after that, only coz easter school takes place between them both.
So that's another two classes.

So 4 classes altogether.
Each consisting of 3 hours.

12 hours of my time to do just maths....

If i don't get a result in the final exam, i'm gonna go nuts!


Moody part is over now, you'll be glad to know, but there isn't honestly much else to speak of.

RE was back to it's good old-fashioned ways of the teacher talking about things completely unrelated to the subject matter.
RE is pretty good coz of tht, Steven sits behind me as well so it can be quite good fun sometimes.

Oh, talking about Steven.
Today (even though my birthday is in June) i walked into school with my birthday present in my top pocket.

A cheque for 196 pounds to pay for my travelling, accomodation and going to see Muse at Wembley with Steven and his dad.

I never even told him i was going to bring it in so he was quite surprised but he took it anyway.
However, when i got home he called me and said it can't be used coz we didn't spell his dad's name right or something.
So my mum will have to write another cheque :P


Anyhoo, on the whole, it wasn't a super, fantastic day thanks to my arch enemy maths but never mind.
I don't fear my maths, it is my enemy, not my opponent

*shifty look*


Cheers guys,
Rowan




Good song and i thought the title was appropriate :P

Start of the Week

Sorry i haven't posted for a few days.

My weekends aren't generally interesting enough to talk about in a post and i wasn't feeling upto blogging yesterday for some reason.

But here we are now :)


So yesterday,

I get into school rather early these days. The bus used to be late but ever since Christmas it always seems to arrive really early. So i got in rather early and that's cool, i can speak with friends before school.

So yeh, i was talking to some friends and then another one called Alan walks in. I think he's quite hot, especially with his long hair so i was dismayed to see he got a haircut!
Yeh, i have a preference for longer hair :P
Not too long, kinda like, eyebrow length at the front and covering the ears at the sides but anyway i was quite disappointed by this. He's still pretty nice tho.

Anyhoo, every single class is beginning to become a pain in the ass, so much work in class plus the homework but i was happy to find out i got 14/20 on a piece of Media homework.
That may not sound good at first glance, but it was our first go at that kind of question and the test isn't for another 2 and a bit weeks, so i'm already achieveing a B and i have time to improve on it, that's good.

I got quite embarrased in Music.
My teacher told me my bass performance was one of the finest he has ever seen throughout his teaching career!
He said this in front of the whole class, i went red lol
He thinks that because i had to wait for 10-15 mins and talk to the examiner, it made things more stressful when in fact it made things way more easy and relaxing. But i took his praise anyway.

I forgot that the whole year was watching a theatre play of MacBeth in the afternoon so i didn't have to worry about the spanish homework i fot got to do.
The play was ok tho. I couldn't really follow it, perhaps coz of the really warm and stuffy room making me tired but at least it got us out of afternoon lessons, that was cool.

And now, today.

I woke up and i just couldn't be bothered at all, i dunno why. I didn't feel particularly tired or anything, i just didn't want to to go today.

Almost missing the bus didn't make things much better. I swear the bus gets earlier each day!
Thank god i made it, although maybe i shouldn't have bothered as i would only be missing a dry french period.
But in PSE i handed in my final choices for next year to my guidance teacher.
We only do 5 subjects next year and this is what i've chosen :

English, French, Music, Media Studies, and Spanish.


Yep i went ahead and decided to do spanish, at least i wont be alone with a class of girls tho, i dont think. I do believe there's two other boys doing it as well as me.....i hope.


It hasn't been the best or most exciting couple of days but one thing has pleased me.

My hair :P

It's just been sitting the way i like it for the past couple of days, over the ears, eyebrow length.
Sometimes it can get really messy and curls up way too much but it hasn't done that recently so yeh that has been quite enjoyable.

Strange how something small like that can make you happy, eh?

Oh, almost forgot to mention this.
My mum found a Stephen Fry book in a charity shop today - The Stars' Tennis Balls.

Not heard of it but i'll check it out.

I just told my mum to look for any Stephen Fry book and she has done.
I can't exactly ask her to specifically get The Liar or Moab is my Washpot coz i think they're both to do with being gay, so she might find it strange if i was to just ask for those two.

But i'm happy with this one, i'll see what's it like.


Love you guys,
Rowan

Fun-Filled Friday!

Well, not quite.

But it was ok.

Nothing of any importance happened today at all, in any class.

But for those of you wondering, i did not see Freddie today.
I don't even know if he was in coz i don't have maths on a Friday and i didn't see him anywhere else so i didn't get the chance to speak to him again today. Need to see him next week.


You may now notice that when you post your comment on here it will be sent to be moderated.

It's nothing to really worry about and i'm not mad at any of you guys.
Sometimes i say things that i would rather not have said or accidently said in my own comments so that's a factor in my decision here. But it also shared with the fact that someone else could say something i would rather they didn't.

Don't think that this is a trust issue, it's not, but it's really again just for safety reasons, i don't want something to crop up on my blog that could get me into some sort of trouble.

So yeh, comments are now going to be moderated, hope that doesn't make any difference to anybody....


Also, i added a formspring page to the side so you can easily ask me anything you want in there, just type away!
It can be rude, funny, serious, whatever. That's what it's there for.


As i said, not much happened in school, except from the journey home.
The bus is normally really busy with people who aren't entitled to get on it but it wasn't today so i got to sit with Alex.
We were both listening to music on our separate ipods and i suggested that we try to listen to the same song at the same time, so we did.

And we got it perfectly, twice.

Two Rage Against the Machine songs - Guerrilla Radio and Killing in the Name.
That was really fun and just really....something that good friends would do i think.

So my song for the day is Guerrilla Radio, quite a change from Scissor Sisters lol.
And yes, Steven found Laura on my ipod and gave me more grief and said "If you get 3 songs, you're officially gay"
It was kinda said in a joking way tho, he wouldn't change his attitude towards me if i did find another song i liked. He isn't that bad lol

But anyway, today's top tune is Guerrilla Radio.


Cheers everyone,
Rowan

So.....

If you haven't read my previous post, you should read it first :P


Today was, apart from the bass exam, a rather normal school day with the inevitable couple of things worth mentioning.

English was good. With my presentation out the way i could just watch everybody elses. So i did, but a noteworthy presentation came from this boy in my class who i think is really hot.
I stare at him in class sometimes, although i know it is risky.
But this gave me the opportunity to stare at him for a good 3 or so minutes, so i took full advantage of that :P

That was good.


Nothing happened from then until lunch apart from the bass exam of course (but that is in my post before this)

But lunch was quite something.

Me and my group of friends all have this table which we pretty much claim as ours.
There's about 20 of us or something, all pretty good friends, some better than others of course.
But today's discussion involved football.
And why i support Liverpool FC when i don't live near or in Liverpool.

I give them the reasons, just like any fan supports their club, they like the players, the stadium, the fans, the atmosphere et al.
Do they listen to that?

No.

Well....half did and half didn't i suppose.

But then it starts getting personal.

They ask "Why do you support Liverpool if none of your family are from there?"

"Sorry, you're wrong, i do have family in Liverpool"

"Oh, so they're all serial rapists as well?"


.....


Charming.

Insult my family and my team all in one go.

Some "friends" i have, honestly.
They're not all bad, it was only a select few who found that comment funny and continued to progress it further, although i won't go into tht.

Funnily enough, neither Steven or Alex were involved in it...

But yeh, i wasn't in a great mood with some people for the rest of the day.


Also got some rather irritating news in maths, although it doesn't involve the subject itself.

There is a boy in my maths class. We shall call him Freddie.

Freddie is most likely gay. He is also rather irritating, even i find him annoying.
He has never said he is gay but the way he acts, the things he says....believe me, if you seen him you would think so too.

He's not what i would say is hot and to be honest he does get on everyone's nerves.

But i couldn't help but feel sorry for him today.


The boy who sits next to me in maths boasts that he was bullying Freddie at lunch because of his assumed sexuality.
I'm not sure exactly what took place but Freddie was abnormally quiet and was crying in maths.
It was made worse that i was sitting next to the person who caused this.

I don't really like Freddie, i don't know him well either, but at that moment i just wanted to give him a big hug and help him out.
I never even got the chance to speak to him coz he was out of the class as soon as the bell rang.

:-/

I hope he starts feeling better.


So yeh, apart from the bass exam going well, today was not overly jolly.

.....The careers evening you may be wondering.

Quite a bore. Very dry, quite informative but very dry.

Went round loads of tables, meeting people of lots of different jobs but i focused mainly on those to do with music, journalism and languages coz that's what i'm good at.

It was bigger than i thought it would be but nothing exciting so that's really all there is too mention about it.


Phew.

It's been quite a long day.

Didn't know if i was going to post this or not but for you guys, i did :)


Oh, and lastly....i found another Scissor Sisters song i like lmao.

It's called "Laura"

I heard it on the bus today and i recognised it although i couldn't put a name to it until the DJ said but i thought it did sound like Scissor Sisters.

:P

Love you guys,
Rowan

Bass Exam

Just a short post :P


It couldn't have gone better.

Honestly, i headed up at half eleven where i got to practice a little next door, with my own bass that i took on the bus with me.
Practice went well.

So then it was my turn, my teacher and i went into the room with the examiner and got things set up.
But...

He didn't have the sheet music that i was playing.

So my teacher had to run off and quickly print some stuff and i got to sit there and have a nice chat with the examiner, he was really nice. Just talking about music, subjects and the likes.
In a way this kinda settled my nerves so that was all good.

Teacher returned ten minutes later and the examiner went over the procedure.

I play 1 song all the way through and sample the other two.

He picked me the one to play that i would rather have not. But it didn't matter, i played through it perfectly, no mistakes that i can recall, timing seemed fine as well as my dynamics.

The other two pieces were the same, no hassle.

So that's all that really happened. I thanked the examiner and me and my teacher exited the room, my teacher shook my hand and told me it was a really strong performance!
Chuffed.

But it's what the examiner thinks at the end of the day and coz it counts towards my final exam i wont get the mark back until i get all my exam results back, in August....

But anyhow, i think i did really well and i'm very pleased with how things went, as i said, i don't think they could have gone much better.

Thanks for all your encouragement guys.

Just gotta practice now for the Guitar Exam which is two weeks today.


Now i must skedaddle. I have homework to do and i'm going to some sort of careers meeting at school tonight.
If i have time when i get back i'll post about other things that happened today.


Cheers,
Rowan


P.S  Here's a little picture for you guys :-)

My bass guitar.

Today's Tripe

What a day it has been!
Well the morning more so than the afternoon but still....

Reason being, i missed my bus, properly this time.

I wasn't in any particular rush this morning, got up, showered, had breakfast as normal, checked emails and went out the door.
It's only when i stepped outside did i realise the time after having checked my phone.
Quarter past 8.
I know if i leave the house after that time, there's a liklihood that i will miss the bus.

And i did.

I sprinted from my house to the stop, a few streets away, and got there in time to see it pulling round the corner.

Lucky i have a back up plan for if this ever happens.

The train station is about ten minutes walk.
I think the train normally arrives at 25 past so to make sure, i sprinted there as well.

I got there just in time to see it pulling up at the platform.

I was thinking, "Oh no, i'm not having this shit, not missing two chances to get to school in one morning" So (with my bag on) i ran like never before and just made it and i met two friends as i was getting on. They were obviosuly looking to skip school whereas i was looking to get there.
They got on the train anyway but the conductor was right there (i had money so i didn't care) but they got off the train and ran to the top carriage lol.
But one of them didn't make it on!
The conductor let him on tho, without paying and we went to the top of the train.
Quite hilarious stuff.
I was done in from all the running so i just slumped down while they hid from any other conductor who may come along.

I was extremely relieved.
Spanish was first and the teacher is so strict about latecoming so i was just really glad.
I did make it into school on time, walked into the class as soon as the bell rang.

Victory.

No hassle from the teacher and no call home asking where i was.
Phew.


So that's before school even started!
Now....

Lol. KO

Nothing major happened aside from that.

I chose my subjects i would be studying for next year and that was about it.

I picked :

English (Mandatory)
French
Music
Media Studies

and....

The toss-up between Modern Studies and Spanish wasn't yet decided....

So i tracked down the other guy in my class who said maybe and i asked him if he was definetely doing it next year and he said he was, along with someone else who changed their mind.

So there'll be 3 of us guys now, and about 15 girls lol.

Complete pie fest!

But yeh, i chose Spanish as my 5th subject.

5 subjects is less than what i'm doing now but it means double periods.....


And that was my day, just about.

Few minor things to mention :

Finally presented in English and it went well.


Although we have just done a test in maths another has been arranged.
It will take place the week before Easter and is the equivalent of a second Prelim apparently.

How lovely.

Maths is shit.


Also on that week, the media test which counts for 20% of my final grade has been given a date.

.....Friday 26th March.

That will be a very important day :P

As well as tomorrow.....my bass guitar exam. Need to get some good sleep tonight.


So yeh, that really is all of today's tripe.


Cheers everyone,
Rowan

P.S Dunno if you were wondering what i got with Rhyn and JJ's iTunes card but i'll say anyway.
Two Queen albums.
A Night at the Opera using Rhyn's and News of the World with JJ's, they're both great albums.
My favs so far off each album are  "You're My Best Friend" and "Sheer Heart Attack" respectively.

It was too obvious too say Bohemian Rhapsody for News of the World lol

My thanks go out again!

Prelim Round-Up and Post-Prelim Ponderings

(Title help supplied by Rhyn :P)


So yes, today i got the biology cut-off score back and as expected i didn't pass.
I wasn't too disheartened tho as it was always gonna be the out come but now that i have all my results back i thought i would share them with you guys.

So here they are :

(Highest to lowest)


French - A 91%
Spanish - A 88%
Modern Studies - A 79%
Music - A 74%
English - A 68%

Media - C 58%

Biology - F 48%
Maths - F 40%


So yeh, quite a tale of two stores there.
One good half the other, bad.

But i know i can improve, maths is easier to improve on than biology but i still know i can pass them both.

But overall the results are good.
5 A's
1 C
2 F's


Not much interesting stuff happened today in school.

Did my maths test, think it went ok.

Didn't have to present in English :)

Only real tale comes from biology.
We were dissecting a sheep's lungs and heart. Or rather, the teacher was.
We still seen everything tho and heard.
He had to cut through it and it made this horrificly crunchy noise.
And with 5 minutes until the bell let school out, the fire alarm went off!

News got to me that whatever set it off came from Alex's lab but we never found out.
It was annoying tho, coz i wanted to see what the lungs felt like (call me weird :P)
So i dashed back to class, put a glove on and had a feel.
Quite horrible to be honest, and really cold!


But today, nothing was getting me down, i was in high spirits since last night and that continued on right through today.
Reason for this?

Well....

JJ got me a gift :D

An iTunes card.

He called it a late Valentine's present, therefore making it the best Valentine's gift i have ever received.
Yes, it even beats the guitar.
Also my first Valentine's gift from a guy, hopefully that will help set the trend :P

But, its not just the fact that its an iTunes card, its the fact that he went out his way to get it for me.
Rhyn also went out of his way and got me one as well, thought i would wait till now so i can say a big, public thank you to both of them.

It's strange talking in third person when i know you will read this, JJ and Rhyn :P
But the gifts you got me have made me so happy.
Yes, you might be saying it's only an iTunes card but as i said it's more than that. Never does the expense or the size of the gift count and this is reflected through these iTunes cards.

The smallest things are just a token of caring, warmth and love and it means so much to me coz you have made my past few days extremely happy. And you always do, with or without gifts, i love you both.


And that goes for everyone here too, everybody's comments and emails matter to me greatly and i love them and i love all you guys, thank you so much for just being here for me. It means a lot.


Love,
Rowan

Marching On In

Yeh, fail title i know :P


Today was just a pretty average day at school i suppose, nothing extremely eventful but a few things worth of note.

The maths test never went ahead today, it has been re-scheduled for tomorrow. Good times.

Biology was quite fun as usual.
Still no pass mark back yet, hopefully soon, but today we were watching a video about the lungs and it was strange.
They were cutting down a sheep's (removed) throat and when they did it made a really crunchy noise :P
Apparently, we're gonna be doing tht tomorrow, should be interesting :P


PE, we got to play badminton XD

I love badminton and i even got put in a group with Steven and i bet him haha.

When we weren't playing he decided to discuss Scissor Sisters with me again, it's getting a bit old to be honest.
I just told him it's only one song i like (and it is only one) but then he's calling me a big fag and stuff like that and talking about how i aspire to "mince" around on stage like they apparently do.

*facepalm*

So i asked him about Queen and Freddie Mercury and he said, "Oh but he's alright, he was a legend, he's allowed to be gay, i can handle that, but anymore than that....*shakes head* "

I left it at that.

It seems that no matter what i say to Steven he just isn't going to accept gay people.
This time next year he won't be at school and in some ways i'll be glad to see the back of him.
He's just so intolerant, not just of gay people but anyone who isn't British, white and Christian.
He's just full of hate for people although i can tell he takes the rip quite a bit, not really meaning everything he says.

But at the same time, i'll be sad to see him leave. He is a good friend to me, he's kind, funny and (although it may not sound like it) easy to get along with.
I think i'll be able to move on a bit more tho, be more who i really am at school but i really dunno how i'll feel when the time comes for him to leave.....


Anyway, returning to school, just for a spot of english.
We're doing group presentations to the class about a book we're reading called Sailmaker.
We were due to present today but didn't have enough time so we have to do it tomorrow.
Then the teacher announces he won't be in tomorrow and the head of english will be. So we're up first presenting to him, lovely.


Spanish was good today. (Don't say that an awful lot)

Our normal teacher wasn't in so we were pleasantly surprised.
We could actually talk a little for once!
So i took the opportunity to ask the four other boys in my class if they were doing spanish next year.
Only one said maybe, the others said no.

Which brings me back to what my mum said last night about spanish.
I perhaps didn't say it very well.

This could get a bit bogged down but try and bare with me.

I was giving the main reasons to my mum about why i didn't want to do spanish (two languages at one time, same teacher etc.)
We discussed those reasons then after that, i added that i might be the only boy in the class, this is when she asked (in a non-serious tone) "Why? Do you get lonely without boys around?"

So it really wasn't out of context but i apologise anyway for my bad writing of that bit.

Another thing in the last post that was written badly by me.
At dinner when my brother said, "Oh, the gay one?" (Stephen Fry)

When he said that, my mum was eating so couldn't speak right after he said that.
So while my mum was eating i rolled my eyes and said, "Yes the gay one"

THEN mum finishes what she was eating and says, "I don't care, i'll look out for some books"

So yeh, sorry wrote it badly in the last post, i hope i've cleared things up now.
What my mum said wasn't really out of context.

Also, a few of you were saying how mums always know and how my mum must be really nice.
She is, but, like everyone, she has her faults.

Such as, last night, i was finishing off on the computer then she asks me if i was almsot done and i said "Yes, almost"
Then, a few minutes later i lose internet connection completely....

I asked my mum if she touched it and she said she didn't but she obviously did as the wirless router is plugged into a socket in my sister's room and as my sister was sleeping, she never touched it.
My mum was the only other person awake in the house, the only person that could have possibly turned the plug off.

It was a really shitty thing to do and even worse of her to lie to me about it which i know she did. :/

But then today, i come home and what has she got me?

A mini-fridge!

WTF.

Last night she was all bitchy and now she's bought me a mini-fridge :S
I don't get it!

Women are confusing lol (hence why i stay away from them :P KO)


But that's quite a coincidence as i'm sure someone mentioned that i should get a mini-fridge a few posts back :P
Well whaddya know?

I've got one now. Haha.

Only thing i need is USB extensions and i pretty much am sorted.
Don't want a wireless keyboard, they're too much hassle in my opinion.


But back to my mum, don't get me wrong, she is nice, really nice, she does strange things sometimes though and is quite confusing and difficult to read.
Nobody is perfect though.

If i was to tell anyone in my immediate family i was gay it would be my mum.
I'm not ready to yet tho, i still need to figure her out and try and find the best way to tell her.
To be honest, the whole topic of coming out to my parents still scares me quite a bit so i'm not really sure about it yet.

I don't really feel ready and i would prefer to leave it for a while, it's not like i'm desperate to tell them.
It's a secret i would like to keep a little longer.


But, as Stephen Fry once said, "A secret is something you tell just one person at a time".

Thanks to r.jimlad for that one, it is very true :)


Love you guys,
Rowan


P.S Hope you had a good start to March!!!